These days, everything is about portability.  I've got USB storage on my keychain and around my neck.  I've got a laptop computer.  There are people I know who carry around smart phones that can check email, connect to the Internet, make phone calls (usually), and even make and store documents if you really need to write that Great American Novel while sitting in traffic.  There are shirts that find wireless internet connections for you, so why not further complete the cycle of unification between form and function by slapping a keyboard into the lap of your jeans (and a mouse in your back pocket)? 

That's right, the device no one ever asked for, keyboard pants, are a reality!  I just hope that, for people like myself who are very, ahem... non-graceful... that this particular keyboard is very well insulated.  Given its location and proximity to my future children, the last thing I need to do is knock over a Diet Coke and electrocute myself in a very important place.

There are so many awful comments/puns that I want to say but can't, because this is a family website!  You guys have no idea how tough it is not to make some of the jokes I want to make.  I better move on before I get myself in trouble.   

One of the most frightening, creepy, and outright good horror films ever made is the 1987 Clive Barker classic, Hellraiser.  In the movie, Lemarchand's puzzle box (also called the Lament Configuration) is an impeccably-made toy that, upon solving, opens a gateway to what is either hell or a hell-like dimension of pain, suffering, and general evil. 

Not coincidentally, the awesome mini-tower that is the Hell's Illusion PC is an impeccably-made gadget that, upon powering up, opens a gateway to the Internet, also a hell-like dimension of pain, suffering, LOLcats, and general evil.  Still, it's a very impressive case mod, and as I'm looking into buying a new computer here soon, I'll be looking for something like that to really make my desktop pop. 

However, I won't be picking up anything that opens gateways to hell, especially not if it's a puzzle.  I can't resist puzzles, and the last thing I want to do is get bored and end up with Cenobites swarming all over my house.  Nobody needs that.

I have a cardboard box full of Nintendo games from my old NES gaming system that I haven't been able to play since last century.  They're not all released on my Wii Virtual Console either, which is a crime because Caveman Games is awesome and everyone should play it, especially the wife-tossing event (If you pick the female Caveman Gamer, you can be the modern stone-age lesbian couple, way ahead of its time in 1988!).  I really want to play these games, but my NES has been broken for years now.  That's why I'm very interested in the FC Mobile. 

I'm not exactly crazy about the button positioning, and I'm not a fan of buying ANYTHING off eBay, but... it's really, really tempting.  Once I see some news about this thing from legitimate sources, I'll be more inclined to check it out.  One thing I don't see me doing is spending hard-earned money on an old NES.  You don't know if it works (even if it does, you'll still have to blow into the cartridges), it might cost a surprising amount of money... but man, do I want to play my NES games again!

Last week on Musical Monday, I featured the brilliant Jonathan Coulton and mentioned how he was included in the ending credits of the game Portal, as well as Rock Band.  Well his song from Portal's ending, Still Alive (click the link to enjoy the in-game version) has become a huge hit to the joy of geeks like myself.  Still, what's a way to make something already geeky geekier?  Use the beloved SNES game Mario Paint to do your own version of the Portal ending theme!

The more I hear by this guy, the more I like him. It gives me good memories of sitting around my college apartment, listening to my old roommate play the acoustic guitar and having adult beverages on the back porch.

As George Lucas' bank account could tell you, Star Wars fans are some of the most loyal fans of any science fiction film series in history.  While Star Trek has ebbed in popularity, Star Wars fans are still out there buying up video games, posters, tee-shirts, books, comics, and even better, Legos!  That's one of the reasons why, in honor of International Star Wars Day, I'm sharing with you the perfect marriage of two geek media, Lego Star Wars pens!

It's a shame these things weren't around in my younger days, as I would've been a huge fan.  I've got two different VHS boxed sets of Star Wars, though I've yet to buy them on DVD.  I'm waiting for the HD version to come out in the next 5 years or whenever George Lucas has the urge to build another mansion somewhere.  Still, it's to his credit that people love his product so much, and I know I'd buy those pens. 

To top off International Star Wars Day, here's the plot of the first Star Wars film as explained by a 3-year-old girl.

HT:  Coolbuzz

Sunday, May 4, is the holiday known as International Star Wars Day.  When you've not only got your own day, but you've got a day that is celebrated internationally, you know you've really got something special on your hands.  If you don't love Star Wars, there's probably something wrong with you, like you're a dirty stinking Trekkie! 

Okay, I'm not here to pick geek fights with 30somethings who live in their parents basements, I'm here to talk about Star Wars Day and specifically, some free swag for Star Wars Day.  Specifically, a free downloadable copy of Star Wars Legacy of the Force:  Betrayal from Deep Discount.  I haven't read the book, or any of the others in the Legacy of the Force series, but when I was in high school I read EVERY Star Wars novel I could get my hands on.  College kind of ruined that, but I'm trying to get back into reading again. 

To celebrate Star Wars, here's everyone's favorite defender of humanity, the Star Wars Kid!

Gadget Grid passes along one of the coolest pool accessories I've ever laid eyes on with this, their Underwater Light Show Fountain.  If you're wanting to make your pool cooler, and you have four spare D-cell batteries, then this is your answer.  The underwater portion of your pool turns random, beautiful colors, while the top of your pool is prettified with a neat little light-up fountain display. 

One of the things I liked most when I had a pool in my back yard was getting up in the morning, going out to sit on the deck, and just watch the rising sun reflect off the calm waters.  Of course, the sunset ws nice too, but since it was an above-ground pool, it wasn't very much fun after dark when you couldn't see anything and were likely bug bait.  That's why something like that fountain would've come in very handy.  It's both beautiful and functional, keeping the water circulating while adding beauty to an already relaxing setting. 

As usual, because I keep odd hours and don't sleep enough, I got my days confused and completely forgot about Musical Monday.  I know there were many tears shed, and since I hate to disappoint, I've got an extra double-geeky dose of Musical Monday for software fans, World of Warcraft geeks, and zombie fanatics. 

Jonathan Coulton is a musician who does things a little differently.  Because he's not signed to a big label, he distributes his music freely under the Creative Commons License, which basically says that you can use his songs for anything you want if it's a non-profit endeavor.  Like, say, a zombie-themed World of Warcraft machinima.  Jonathan is incredibly talented, as a lot of his songs have become big deals in the machinima world, and he's even gotten into the act as part of the latest Hit games Rock Band and Portal!  It couldn't happen to a more talented dude.

I've already written here, several times, about how much of a morning person I'm not.  That's why my blogs generally come in here well after the work day, because it's a constant struggle to get up and get moving in the morning.  To make matters worse, whenever my alarm goes off, I get an ear full of complaints about how often I let it go off, how much I rely on the snooze bar, and any number of other grouses related to my inability to wake up in one fell swoop and my need to slowly rouse from my slumber.  I already hate mornings, and complaining constantly about how I go about my morning business is a quick way to ruin the rest of my day, kthnx.

That's why I need to get my hands on something like the Glo Pillow.  It's supposed to awaken the user naturally, using the power of incredibly bright lights that slowly get brighter, thus slowly rousing the unconscious sleeper.  Would just the lights work for me?  I'm not sure; probably not.  I sleep with the light on now all the time, so I'm not sure if this would help unless the pillow also vibrated or gave me an electric shock. 

I'll try anything to shut up all the complaining, though.  Since I've given up coffee, I'm a bear before noon (and even after noon, I'm still kind of grumpy).  One of these days, mark my word, I'm going to scream at the first person who bothers me about my morning routine.  Just leave me along! 

I'm a big fan of store promotions.  There are always such cool things at grocery stores, electronics stores, and even liquor stores that normal people can't get access to unless they know a distributor or work at the place and somehow escape with it after work.  Your best chance to get any of that kind of stuff, aside from becoming manager, is to check eBay.  That's where I found this incredible vintage World of Nintendo light-up sign!

I absolutely love things like this.  My room at home is full of posters from movie theaters and video stores I've worked at, collectible action figures I bought with employee discounts, and light up beer signs and displays from my time working at the liquor store.  I've got autographed teeshirts, pictures, posters, and DVDs all over the place.  I even grab set lists from concerts I go to.

Not only am I a big fan of collectibles, I'm also a hopelessly cluttered packrat.  I hate to throw anything out, which is why I have about 7 years worth of Sports Illustrated magazines filling my bookshelves and cardboard boxes.  I know I need to at least figure out a way to get more organized, but it's hard when your space is also everyone else's space for dumping stuff they don't want.