Visit the Shaks

Way back in August, Ginger tipped over a glass of juice and her laptop became a gigantic, smoking paperweight.  In the comments section, a lot was made about the lack of waterproofing on laptops and other computer peripherals.  Granted, there are waterproof computers, but they're fairly expensive and there are hardware limitations with the average Toughbook (and laptops in general, to be honest), but you don't see a ton of that damage prevention technology crossing over into the desktop world, where you're a lot more likely to be drinking something while working.

That's where iKey comes in.  Even though the constant use of iSomething is really getting on my last good nerve, the keyboards the company makes are just awesome.  Take, for example, this completely waterproofed keyboard.  iKey specializes in military and hospital applications, and they make a lot of very rugged, resistant, integrated keyboard, pointing devices, and displays if you're the kind of guy who drags his desktop out into a monsoon or who works closely with a lot of liquids and needs a keyboard that can take a blast from the fire hose. 

Since the weakest point in your average laptop is the keyboard, couldn't they somehow graft one of these stainless-steel bad boys into a laptop to make it a little more spill resistant? 

I've got a laptop that I absolutely love.  It's the only computer I have these days that can run World of Warcraft, and as such, it gets a lot of action.  Unfortunately, it's still second place after my desktop in functionality, if only because my desktop has a full-sized keyboard, slightly faster internet connection, and all the word processors that I sometimes use to type out my posts for blogs like this one here.  My HP has been the best desktop I've ever had, but without a RAM boost and possibly a faster processor, it's about at the end of its lifespan. 

Until that day, my laptop remains a second-class citizen.  My mouse is one place, my charging cable is stretched across the floor, my laptop case is somewhere else, and my laptop itself is in yet another location, fighting with my desktop for space.  Organization is not my strong suit (neither is punctuality, but that's another story), so I need something like this IKEA laptop workstation to get everything organized.  If I could put it in the exercise room and figure out a way to blog or play WoW while riding the exercise bike or on the treadmill, then maybe getting in shape wouldn't be like pulling teeth.

Then again, IKEA has those great meatballs, and I LOVE meatballs.  If I go over here and buy it for $39.99, then I'll probably order some meatballs with it.  That kind of defeats the whole 'put the computer somewhere so I can get in shape while being a geek' plan.

One of the most frightening, creepy, and outright good horror films ever made is the 1987 Clive Barker classic, Hellraiser.  In the movie, Lemarchand's puzzle box (also called the Lament Configuration) is an impeccably-made toy that, upon solving, opens a gateway to what is either hell or a hell-like dimension of pain, suffering, and general evil. 

Not coincidentally, the awesome mini-tower that is the Hell's Illusion PC is an impeccably-made gadget that, upon powering up, opens a gateway to the Internet, also a hell-like dimension of pain, suffering, LOLcats, and general evil.  Still, it's a very impressive case mod, and as I'm looking into buying a new computer here soon, I'll be looking for something like that to really make my desktop pop. 

However, I won't be picking up anything that opens gateways to hell, especially not if it's a puzzle.  I can't resist puzzles, and the last thing I want to do is get bored and end up with Cenobites swarming all over my house.  Nobody needs that.

Microsoft has found something to do with its famous Works program.  For years, Works has come bundled on basically every computer I've bought, and I've never really used it because I've always bought or installed MS Office.  I never bought it on its own, because I figured if I'm going to pay $50 for something, I may as well pay $100 or more and get the top of the line software suite. 

Microsoft, no doubt realizing this, has decided to do something different with Works.  In an attempt to stave off free programs like Google Docs and Open Office, they've launched a trial program to turn Works into an ad-supported piece of freeware that's being released in limited quantites.  Wouldn't it be great if you could get a built-in free office suite that works natively with MS Word?  Of course, Docs and Open Office can do that, but they're far from built in. 

What say you?  Would you use Works if it was free, or would you still ignore it for an installation of an older version of MS Office?

Image:  HowStuffWorks

You know, I've ripped Sony a lot in this blog for the things they've said, positions they've taken, the price of their video game console, their fear of MP3s... basically, everything about the way they do business doesn't agree with me.  Then again, I might still be holding a grudge because the Discman I bought in high school was the worst CD player I've ever owned.  Either way, I can give credit where credit is due, and I'm really liking the ads for the Sony Bravia HD TVs. 

The ad itself is simple, beautiful, and incredibly effective.  The behind the scenes footage is even better, as you can see just how hard it was to put together a 30-foot-tall Claymation rabbit in the middle of New York City.  Sony's definitely onto something with these ads.  Head over to The Squirrel Queen's blog to check out the rest of the advertisements.  They're all brilliant.

Chrysler has had a tough time of it lately.  Ownership changes, billion dollar losses... things are looking pretty tough in Detroit these days.  That said, they're trying hard to turn things around, and one of their first steps is to reach out to geeks.

After the marketing success of Microsoft's Sync in Ford cars, Chrysler is adding WiFi access and wireless data to their automobiles, in addition to the back-seat TV.  I guess any improvement is good, but people are distracted enough by their text messages, cell phones, and in-dash DVD players.  Do we really need them browsing the web and sending emails, too?  Though, if you're stuck in traffic, it would be very nice to keep entertained with a nice game of World of Warcraft.  I guess everything has its good points and bad points.   

Continuing with the Wii-centric kick I seem to be on, here's one of the coolest Wiimote mods I've ever seen, set to... you guessed it, a Guitar Hero III song.  It seems I can't shake that Guitar Hero monkey off my back, no matter what I do.  Still, it's very cool, and a great nod to the holiday light show everyone's familiar with.

H/T:  Nintendo Wii Fanboy

I hate writing these things, but this is my second obituary this month.

Sir Arthur C. Clarke, noted author, screenwriter, inventor, and the theoretical father of the geosynchronous communications satellite relay that enable us to communicate instantaneously anywhere on Planet Earth passed away.  Clarke wrote 34 fiction novels, dozens of short stories, and is one of the most honored and respected men of his time.  He was nominated for the Nobel Peace Price, has an asteroid named after him, has had several spacecraft named after him, and is the author of Clarke's Three Laws of Prediction.

1.  When a distinguished but elderly scientist states that something is possible, he is almost certainly right. When he states that something is impossible, he is very probably wrong.

2.  The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible.

3.  Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.

While adept at the utilization of technology (he started using email in 1984!), Clarke was equally adept at the magic of creating worlds.  He's one of my favorite authors, and his presence in the science fiction and science fact communities will be sorely missed.  Godspeed, Mr. Clarke.

Hey kids, sorry about missing Friday.  I've been under the weather, and we're currently buried in about 8 inches of snow here in Louisville, so when I have been feeling decent, I've had to be outside shoveling my car out.  Sigh.

Long story short, Friday at work we all got new computers.  Not that I was there, but they were there Thursday to install them when I left, so they should've been running by Friday.  So, my question to you, gentle viewer, is this:  what do I do to make this new computer acceptable to my standards?  What do you recommend installing on a new computer?  What can't you live without that I should have on my work box? 

So far, I've got Firefox, Weatherbug, and... well, nothing else.  Do any of you have anything I should add that would make my work or blogging that much easier?

Image:  PC mag

Normally I post every day, Monday through Friday.  Generally, I don’t post until after dinner and a nap, which means I’m generally posting fairly last in the Eastern time zone.  Unfortunately, last night, my Internet access was down, which means no post, but it gave me an idea for something to post here complaining about my internet access. 

I have cable internet.  For whatever reason, every so often (sometimes hours, sometimes days), our internet will randomly stop working.  I don’t know if this is the case normally everywhere people have cable internet, or just here, but it’s so commonplace that the cable system runs commercials telling people what to do to correct their connection:  power down (modem, router, computers, etc) and power up again.  That (usually) corrects the problem.  Obviously not last night.  By the time it started working, it was already to late to post anything coherent, so I just gave up.

So my question to you, dear reader, is this:  do you have high speed internet service?  If so, do you have to turn off all your stuff at least 4 times a week to restore internet service to your home?  Does it annoy you as much as it annoys me?  Is this just MY cable company’s internet service? 

If this is everyone, WHY is it necessary?  What’s the fundamental flaw in cable internet that requires me to crawl under my desk and unplug stuff?  Someone explain this to me, because my local nameless cable company provides no good insight.

Image:  Concrete Badger

So, have you guys seen the new Knight Rider show they're bringing back?  I hate to say that I have not, but I do like the new KITT car, so whenever I can stop sleeping through the replays of the pilot movie, or when I can find it over on NBC's website, I'll definitely be checking it out.  I actually have a talking KITT toy car from back in the day, and somewhere in my house is a Hoff figure just made to fit in the driver's seat.  It's awesome.

In honor of the awesomeness of talking cars that fight evil, allow me to share with you an awesome-looking Knight Rider case mod I found over on Engadget.  I just wish the sample music they had KITT play was the Knight Rider theme, or that Punjabi rap song with the Knight Rider theme as the hook.  Beggars can't be choosers, I guess!

Pretty awesome, huh?

There's a new virus making the rounds on MSN and Windows Live Messenger at the moment, and I personally got the suspicious chat link myself, though thankfully the newest version of IE doesn't auto-run anything and I closed the prompt without enabling the link.  I dodged a bullet, but I figured I'd spread the word so everyone else just outright avoids the problem.

Check out this post over on Gear Diary, which goes into bigger detail about the virus and how it spreads, and afterwards, if you think you're afflicted with the problem, go here for details on how to remove it, with a virus remover having been posted in the comments.  More info here.  I don't know about everyone else, but I hate reformatting my hard drive, and if I can avoid it, I do.

I just barely dodged a bullet, since apparently this is a nasty virus.  IE7, for all its faults, saved my bacon tonight. 

Hey gang, I'm coming to you live from Ground Zero of the Tornado Belt, as tonight some seriously bad weather has moved through my area.  We've gone from simple rain in the morning to a serious, nasty red bout of severe thunderstorms and tornado warnings in a matter of hours, but here I am on my computer, typing away.  If the TV hadn't gone to transmitting the awful squawking buzz noise that always signals bad weather, I'd probably still be asleep (rain knocks me right out). 

I can count on one hand the number of times I've actually turned off my computer during a storm.  I'm not sure why I don't fear the Boogeyman that is storm surges and power outages doing some serious damage to my computer.  My entire house is on a hardwired surge protector, and my electronics are on their own secondary surge protectors, so I'm relatively immune to that sort of thing.  We also have underground utilities, so when we lose power it's generally it's the transformer blowing out.

What about you, dear reader?  Do you go into hiding when bad weather hits, or do you just keep blogging and surfing like normal?  Surely I can't be the only fearless storm blogger in the world. 

It's the ultimate solution for travelers who are unable to get the space in their carry-on luggage to store a 4x3x2 mouse.  Space is at a premium when traveling anywhere, after all, so why take up space that could be used to hold an extra stick of deodorant if you don't have to?  Simply deflate your mouse, roll it up, and...  wait, what?  You don't have an inflatable mouse?!

I guess I should point out that no one has an inflatable mouse yet, since Yanko Design is more of a potential company and not an actual manufacturing firm, but if they had one of these available for the price of a normal mouse, or if I thought I could hack something together, I'd totally make/use a blow-up mouse, if only because it'd be awesome to fill with helium for pranking purposes.  Imagine the look in your co-worker's faces when you walk away from your desk and your mouse suddenly goes airborne!

H/T:  Engadget, of course. 

Click and drag a little love into your life with this heart-shaped mouse from the Victoria & Albert Museum Shop.  What better way to show the geek in your life that you love him/her than by offering your tacit approval of their horrible addiction to Solitaire or Minesweeper by giving them the tool they need to feed their compulsive clicking?  We both know you're a passive-aggressive enabler, so get to enabling!

The mouse is compatible to both USB and P/S ports and works with both Mac and PC, so even if you’re not exactly the sort to know a motherboard from a fully operational funkadelic mothership, you can be confident this is one gift that’s going to work with whatever system or software your sweetheart loves almost as much as s/he loves you.  Plus, it’s made in Switzerland, so odds are good that the mouse is actually a gigantic piece of chocolate wrapped in some sort of hard candy/plastic shell. 

H/T:  PopGadget

I just had a few minutes to check out the video about the Apple MacBook Air. I WANT it! I want it bad.

I have been a PC user up until now but am seriously considering converting just because the Air is so cool.

Super Sleek
Aside from the incredible thinness (0.16 to 0.76 inch- about the size of your index finger) and light weight ( just 3 lbs!) it also offers the advantages of a full size notebook. Like a full size key board that is back lit for ease of use in low light situations such as conference rooms and airplanes.

Impressive Display 
The glossy 13.3-inch, widescreen LED backlit display is the same viewable size as the screen on MacBook. The 1280-by-800 resolution gives you vibrant images and rich colors at full brightness.

Built In Camera
Unlike most other ultraportable notebooks, MacBook Air includes a built-in camera they refer to as iSite. The iSight camera along with iChat software makes video chatting easy anywhere there’s a wireless network.

Slim Battery
This impressively slim battery does not compromise power. It is said to provide 5 hours of wireless activity.

Touchpad Capabilities
Last but not least is the feature that I loved most. The oversized trackpad with multi-touch technology. This design is taken from the gesture based commands of the iPhone and Ipod. You can pinch, swipe, or rotate to zoom in on text, advance through a photo album, or adjust an image. It will recognize the difference between two finger commands and three finger commands.

The Dilemma...I know nothing about operating a Mac. I am a self taught PC user (other than the DOS class in high school many moons ago) and would not consider myself highly techy. But this machine is so sexy I feel like I must have it. But I am trepidatious. Is the conversion too hard to tackle for an ole gal like me? You know what they say about teaching old dogs new tricks. Will I feel lost and therefore less productive? I certainly dont have time to be less productive. These are the questions that I ask myself.

Of course the Apple Store offers free tutoring and classes that I can take, but again thats just more time invested that could be spent elsewhere. So what do I do??? I ask you Shak-ers that are Mac converts; will I regret it? Let me know what you all think so I can make the right decision.

I'll eagerly await your vote...To Mac or not to Mac, that is the question.

How was your morning?  Did you have a good drive into work, should you drive into work?  Have a delicious bowl of cereal and your traditional 32 oz Styrofoam cup of coffee from the gas station?  It’s cold out there, so I hope you bundled up before you left home.

Unfortunately, there’s been a problem for all of us who have website hosting through Dreamhost.  However you’re paying for your hosting, go right now and check your billing statement.  I’ll wait.

*waits for the screaming and cursing to die down*

Thanks to a major snafu on their part, Dreamhost has billed users for an entire year (December 2008) rather than last month (December 2007), slapping bills ranging from several hundred to several thousand dollars into checking accounts and credit cards worldwide.  That means if you wrote that mortgage check on Friday, it might’ve bounced today.  Which means you’ll have overdraft fees, late fees for your mortgage, credit penalties, and a whole world of excrement to sort through.  I hope you enjoy making lots of telephone calls to customer service centers across the globe, because that’s your future. 

It’s almost as if the Dreamhost billing department came into your house, hopped up onto your breakfast nook, dropped trou, and deposited a steaming pile of grump into your cereal, isn’t it?  Judging from the over 460 angry responses, a lot of otherwise competent and well-behaved bill payers woke up to a bowl of Total and poop.

Image:  I Can Has Cheezburger

Dell’s boutique brand, Alienware (disclosure:  I have and love my Alienware laptop), has released what is probably the coolest monitor I’ve ever seen for computer usage.  It’s a four-panel monitor that mimics real peripheral vision with its beefy 2880 x 900 measurements.  I’ve seen multi-monitor setups before, but this not only takes the cake, it takes the whole bakery.  It’s not available for purchase yet, but it’s from Alienware, so it’ll go for well over $2000, at least. 

Speaking of things I’ll never be able to buy ever, Panasonic does Alienware and the TV industry one better by launching a massive, 11-foot wide 150-inch television.  The previous leader was Sharp’s 108-inch TV, but this… yeah, this blows that out of the water.  I’m not even sure I have an uninterrupted 11-foot span of wall in my house that isn’t my hallway.  Forget that monitor; this is what I want to hook my computer up to!

With the impending change-over from Warner Studios from HD DVD to Blu-ray, the format war looks like it’s just about dead save Universal.  Now, I’ve made no secret of my loathing for Blu-ray, for Sony’s proprietary systems, for the fact that Sony rushed out an incomplete format that still lacks a lot of the features of HD DVD and still needs firmware upgrades because first-generation players won’t handle all new Blu-ray DVDs, and because I like my 200-something DVDs the way they are and don’t need HD versions. 

I love my On Demand service from the local cable monopoly.  I love being able to watch whatever’s available at any time of the day or night, regardless of what else is on or the appropriateness of the program.  Horror movie before breakfast?  Done.  Cartoons at midnight?  All over it.  Sure, the selection is limited, but usually I can find something on that I want to watch more than what’s actually on TV. 

Thankfully, Netflix and LG are working on something that may solve the selection problem.  There’s even been a high-definition movie streamed instantly across the aether.  If you’d like to read more about it, head on over here and check out my article.

I just subscribed to Netflix last week, and so far I'm really digging it.  I just got in my copy of "Death Race 2000" Saturday, and I'm really excited about watching everything they have to offer.  If they could just stream the movies straight to my cable box, I'd never go to the video store again!

This holiday season, I ordered most of my gifts from Amazon.  Normally I don't have a problem with Amazon, as it's my preferred way to buy gifts for folks I don't live near.  I order my gifts about the same time every year, but for some reason, this year, I had not one, not three, but at least 5 gifts that, while ordered in the middle of December, won't be shipped until well after New Year's Day. 

I didn't think there'd be a huge run on Altered States and Saturday Night Fever, but maybe there was.  Considering the gifts were all in stock and had ship before Christmas dates when I ordered them, I don't know what happened.  Did anyone else have problems with Amazon running out of gifts, or was it just me? 

I have a friend who is the biggest Peanuts fan ever, but I don't think even she would fork over $2700 for an underpowered Peanuts-themed laptop from Epson.  I mean, it's cute and all, I guess, but... for that much money I could buy a gaming laptop that would absolutely eat this thing's lunch and get as many Peanuts stickers as I could possibly want to decorate it.

Hopefully it's just a really old spec.  Otherwise the Japanese are crazier than I thought, and I thought they were pretty crazy.  I can definitely tell you they're crazy about Peanuts and Hello Kitty.

Everyone who buys a laptop needs a cool bag.  Nobody wants to carry around some plain old black sack like everyone else, and not everyone wants to dedicate a big chunk of backpack which won't actually protect your precious lappy in the event of a mild jostling.  Those computers are both delicate and expensive, after all.

Now, I use Alienware's AlienArmor briefcase to protect my laptop, but that's because I have a 17-inch laptop that would cost me two arms, a leg, and most of my toes to replace (also, whenever I go anywhere with it, I feel like a spy... which is a great feeling).  It generally stays on my desk next to my faithful desktop, and it usually only goes with me when I travel somewhere or when, for whatever reason, I need to be away from my desktop but still wasting time.  I actually don't boot it up that often, because I'm so used to the way my desktop is laid out. 

If I was carrying around a little 15-inch Dell or something for my daily business, or back and forth to classes at school (I can type faster than I can write, and I can actually read my typing, but I could never afford a laptop when I was in college because I had to budget most of my money for pizza and beer), I'd probably pick up this awesome-looking Halo 3 Messenger Bag.  It's a good daily use bag, as it holds your laptop, 2 text books, and various accessories.

Plus, did I mention it looks awesome?  Because it totally does.   

Well, I hate to say I told you so, but last week I went around to my friends and told them in no uncertain terms that CompUSA, the venerable mediocre retailer of overpriced electronics, was going to go under soon, so to be prepared for the bargain rush.  And now, it's official.

I won't say I'm sad to see CompUSA go, because they were mostly awful stores that were difficult to navigate, full of people who didn't know their backsides from a hole in the ground, and had mostly mediocre to poor-quality stuff inside, but at least once a month you could buy spindle packs of CD-Rs for pennies after the rebate.  I always wondered how they could make money doing that. 

Apparently, they couldn't.

Image:  ArsTechnica

Vaporware is something of a tradition in every industry that thrives on publicity moreso than actual products in hand. What is vaporware? Vaporware is anything that is announced—software, hardware, movie, book—that is given a release window and never actually released.

Wired has announced, for the 10th year in a row, its annual vaporware awards. They’re accepting nominations now, and unlike most of the titles listed, they’ll actually release their awards. I’ve fallen victim to a lot of vaporware over the years, and here are some of the best ones.

Duke Nukem Forever: Announced in 1996, expected to be released in 1998. Still expecting to be released in 2008.

Guns ‘n’ Roses Chinese Democracy: How long have Guns ’n’ Roses fans been waiting on this album? Almost as long as Duke Nukem Forever, if not longer. Still, Beach Boys fans have been waiting for Smile for 37 years without much reward.

Starcraft: Ghost: Blizzard is famous for announcing titles, then delaying them until they’re ready. Both Diablo II and Warcraft III were dismissed as vaporware and eventually released to glowing reviews and amazing sales. Starcraft Ghost has been pending for 5 years now. Will it eventually come out? Who knows.

Windows XP Service Pack 3: Snort, yeah right. Someday, maybe, if people continue not buying Vista. Then again, Bluetooth was dismissed as vaporware, too.

The 1994 “Fantastic Four” movie: Roger Corman, my personal hero, made it as an ashcan copy so the developers could hold onto the rights. It disappeared into the ether shortly after. Rumor has it Marvel Comics chairman Avi Arad bought the film and all available negatives and burned it. Other vaporware movies are “Ghostbusters 3” (announced in the late 90s), and “Ender’s Game,” based on the famous sci-fi novel by Orson Scott Card.

My haircut: I’ve announced for, oh, four months now that I’m planning on getting a hair cut. It’s officially trapped in development hell.

Image: PocketPC Thoughts